Stealing time for me to rest here~~

sort of 'compensation' as i spend alot to buy their products~~diary 2010..but i love it^^

this is d mask pack~~they are nice 2 use~~

specially love this 'salmon brightening eye serum'.can't believe salmon is used as ingredient

Finally got my time o do some ramblings here..and today eventually i cleared up my taxation test which i actually spent a plenty of time cracking my head to prepare for it..damn tiring and torturing..i hate so much when d more i studied, d more confusion i gain from that..a lot of rulings, sections, exemptions, court orders..bla bla bla..okokok, why do we have to know so much on this..oh ya..to pass for d paper? to become a superb tax agent in future? no no no..is to prevent ourselves being cheated in future..or is to find more ways to cheat in future? get so excited when i got my answers right when doing d computation for various type of income..this become some tiny satisfaction for me so that i still think that d effort i put in at least is proven in some ways...

Recently, i am spending a lot on my skin care products..i do rely on skin food very much ever since i first started tried on its basic skin care products such as toner, essence, emulsion and etc..they give rather good effect i think..and the very initial reason for me to try on it is actually skin's food products are made up from vary natural ingredients such as fruits and veges, even the cleanser's ingredient is actually cuppuchino..amazing rite?it does not cause danger to our skin since our skin is actually d most sensitive part of our body..not like d previous product i used to buy..it contains a lot of chemical ingredients inside..although my skin is not directly affected from using it but i was afraid that it might happen on a later day..

I actually has very little knowledge about mask sheet for what i tin of..since different ppl sound their opinion in totally different way..i guess i should really do some serious+careful research on it..some of them said that d mask sheet actually contains alcohol which is bad to our skin although it gives us cooling effect..is that so?while some others told that doin mask is a very important step for gals to keep their skin nice as mask sheet provide easier absorption of vitamins needed for our skin..dono a~~

Putting great effort to fulfill my life recently..although at times things get harder and tougher..but this is life seems to be..d more u strive for it..the more u could gain from that..i deeply agree on that though~~At times..i try to be myself, the real me.however, for some of d times, thing does not work like tat..not everyone of us deserved to own 100% freedom where you can tell what you want, see only d pleasure part of thing, respond only when you feel good, gets angry whenever things around get wrong..but believe me..things do not go tis way..most of d times..we got to accommodate and endure every little unpleasure thing of life..that's how we get ourselves to learn..not everyone will think for u..not everyone will care for u..and such is life..Gosh...

I love ppl who loves me..i care ppl who cares me..things become better when both parties stand for each other without second thought~~wonderful rite??however even though u r standing alone..don't cry but think y u should cry for it? u r still d best even it's just u alone..friends are wonderful when u scare to b alone..try to find one but even if u fail to..stand by urself is nt something too bad..things get really bad only when you yourself don't standby urself...

I wish everyone could have better day everyday when u guys wake up in d morning~~

~Get Back On Track~

Few days i actually didn't turn up here for blogging..and the moment when i bring myself back here..i guess i would say--I'm recovering..and i'm currently on my way heading to a better situation..a better tomorrow..it's hard to let go something hurt and bad..but what for if you keep holding it?...if you force yourself to be happy..and you know the fact is 'YOU ARE NOT'!!!..never try to tell myself to be happy again..because from things happened to me..i got myself to learn..it is stupid to force ourselves keep smiling but at behind we are actually carrying a real heavy + hectic heart inside us..the beating of pulse don't even indicate we are still alive at that moment though~~

Getting better to face things around now..if I were to say i finally get myself to adapt..am i right?ya..perhaps..and i really hope things will keep on improving as it will enlighten my hope for life at least..i think i know myself pretty well and i know i'm not going to live by myself..reason why is because i m not that strong!!!i need friends and friends will really change my perspective towards a lot of things and perhaps..in some way..they are leading me to become a better me~~good friends can play a real important role in life and i actually agree about this very much..i don't stand by myself but i realize at certain stage of process in life..we got to experience a lot by just ourselves..we feel alone..we need each other..can we make things different?

Get myself involve in a a number of lessons lately..i wish to fulfill my life v meaningful things..i wish to stop myself from thinking noncense v al those unallocated free time..i wish i can learn in every process and hopefully this will make up a better me~~

Let's all of us cheer for life~~

Another depressed one~~

Was reading through friend's blog..get to know that she was very sad about d leaving of one of d friends among their group..not going to further studies anymore v them..seeing d blog i was like having same feelings and i'm like experiencing d same thoughts v her..we got to choose when d time we actually completed our diploma level in penang..whether u further up to d advanced level in kl, going to utar, or to any other institution..and that's how our sad story begin@@..of course everyone would have different thoughts on where they should further their studies..and it's like making a serious decision which means we actually having superb high percentage to regret on d later time if we just got to choose d wrong one..and perhaps every choices leads to an dead end..

Was crying a lot of times since i came here..even my bf going to force me to stop my studies here and send me bc to hometown..perhaps i will go insane if i were to keep on..worries and tension finally break me down..i would not surrender..i thought..but so what..i was crying on d phone conversation v mom..yearn for d very warm 'home sweet home'..i never been so fragile b4 and this could surprise her i thought..she wanted me to go bc as i would juz gain nothing if i were to live on such unhappy life..miss penang cuz we used to be so simple and innocent over everything..we could enjoy anything together not even v a little bit of discrimination..i miss my hometown badly as i feel free to b there..and there are some friends who accompanied me since my childhood..they could share my happiness and even sorrows..i juz so miss all of them~meelin~who is d one having longest friendship v me..cares me whenever i need..show her appreciation towards our friendship and i really wish to hug her right now!!!and not to forget a lot more~jye gin n mui hui..miss u both so much..all of u craved a lot of memories for me~~big big applause to u al!!!

Not going to complain anymore..that's how i comfort myself each time i fall..there is still beautiful part of life which i get it from here..yup..there is!!!i still have friends v me..we form our group in class although nt much of us but they had been accompany me to go through many things..thx to u al~~ i have my buddy~hoay shuang here too..giving me support all d time..appreciate it lotz~~and of course my friendly hs mate..enjoy staying v them..

Life is not as ugly as what i tin..rite?..but why i use to hate it..!!!i was getting tired and tired..weaker and weaker..tis place doesn't look right for..something must have gone wrong..perhaps d way how ppl behave here..they just can't get me right..or maybe the hectic lifestyle over here which drive me crazy..many many more reasons to actually convince me--this is not d place where i should belong..!!!

~My kampar~ipoh trip~

Hi there..such a hiatus since d very last day i updated my blog..was having real hectic life lately..oops i should nt say it in this way..it should be it is always very hectic in my life..arghh..visited kampar couple days ago..thx god i made my way to there and d very important thing was i met my very dear friends again!!!i missed them a lotz and i was so excited to see them again!!!

especially thx to hooi ting~my superb sweet friend..she is always by my side to support and help out since d very 1st day i met her..listen to me whenever i need a pair of ear..she has made herself a very best friend to me..thx lotz lotz..n nt foget to show my appreciation to jane~she is so kind and warm..bringing us a lot of happiness^^i enjoyed shopping and chatting v them whole day..all of these left me so tired at d night because i was too enjoyed and i don even realized i was running out of energy!!!asking myself..starting from when since i forgot to smile and laugh?..since i was coming to kl??ya..probably pressure n stress has actually grabbed my happiness away..but on d day i visited them..i laughed whole day and juz on that moment..i actually convinced myself~~life may be still beautiful indeed!!!thx both of u so so much~~

will miss all of these so much~~i'm sure i will pay my visit again~~n welcome for coming too..do tk care gals~~may all of us having great life then!!!

~I Learn to Appreciate Each Tiny Satisfaction in Life~

~There might be still LOVE exist inside us even things changed~

I were once feeling so upset about all those misfortune which tend to appear in my life..found no way out and i keep on asking myself~'why should i live my life in such a way?such a way that i really hate about..'when everything turned to be so meaningless..i blamed everything and anything~~i should have lived a happy and relaxing life..enjoying while studying..no stress no pain..do things which I really wish to do..go places where i really wish to go..spend time with all those i love about..that's how the definition of life is fulfilled..rite?~~

At d moment I keep on grumbling..I never know i actually ignored d sorrow which suffered by someone who stay by my side and stand for me whenever i need him..i do not realize that he never complain and he never show how it felt when he was so stressful when facing hardship..d situation became even torturing when i failed to appreciate things in life and keep on complaining..when i was speaking through hp v friends telling them how miserable was my life here..i never realize d dinner was well-cooked and served just right on my table..when d moment i was watching drama while eating..all those fish and chicken had become boneless and was placed on top of d rice..ya..sometimes i use to ignore a lot of things..and some of the things may be so meaningful by itself..i never get myself to appreciate it and that was my fault..

Learn to appreciate each tiny satisfaction in life would probably become some kinda knowledge in life..looks like just s basic concept in life but sadly most of d time..we failed..Maybe..things just don't get right when we ourselves refuse it to become a right one..does this make sense?it could be..i totally don't enjoy my lifestyle over here..and this could because of i refused to accept it from d very beginning..

Life seems to become even harder each day i proceed..I desire for a better life in future and that's why I pay for it..there's always hope in life..i guess so..and if there is..''can i have my every tomorrow to be as beautiful as the smile in my heart..?''

Somewhere for me to lean on...??

Finally I realized..there's moment when we feel so bad until we find no way out except letting tears dry out..and on that moment..I don't need any reason..and with whatever reason also..on that point of time..crying would probably be d best solution to letting go of my pain..we use to have so many reasons to prove ourselves we are living happily but normally we find no reason why we are unhappy...finally getting tired of everything..i really got to admit this huh??

Walking along the pathway..the so called 'interesting and challenging' lifestyle finally drive me crazy..watching ppl all around are busy to strive for their living goal..they are approaching their success with full effort but why am i standing so far away and i even couldn't find a place to accommodate me...yup..i should not surrender for every reason..i should work harder and even harder..braver and even braver..!!!i promised myself would never let my tears dropping down again..crying would eventually make me weaker and pessimistic. I know..but where should I find my strength from??

~Life meant for...?~

hArlo..finally coming back for blogging again..hm..normally i don't really have mood or intention to blog when i am happy with everything around unless there is special moment which i really wish to share..however when things go another way round..i can't find a better place for me to tell everything except blogging..reason why..firstly..everyone whom you trusted a lot would not be always available to lend you their ears..secondly..would you actually trust someone so easily..?even for the case of close friends..you might not know how to speak out sometimes..especially when everything happened to you seemed so unfair that you couldn't find excuse to console yourself anymore..life turns to be so meaningless at that of time!!!have you guys actually experienced this b4??..and ya..i did..

when the moment you try to do ur best..try so hard to survive from the world of gossip and scandal..let's find urself one second and think..do all of these worth you to sacrifice??life should not be so tiring and miserable..rite??sometimes i was thinking..'what do i actually lived for?'..for myself?for my loved one?or for somebody who need me?..and most of d time..we don even get d chance to choose..is life meant to compromise?endure v every sorrow in life without having second word?is life meant to a lie?how frequently do we actually tell the truth from our heart??even to those who are so close to us..and we found out that..most of the truth sound bad..we prefer to lie because it looks good in some way??this could make sense i thought..

Life does not goes in such way you want it to be..we have no power to control but to live on..'Don't aim too much to design ur life with what you think of..but change the bad part of life to a better one'..is that so??..when everything went upside down in ur life..there's no other way out except for that..rite??i guess what we can do is always stay optimistic..never surrender to failure in life..but to be braver and braver each time you fail and stand up for second chance~~

~Happy Birthday to My Beloved Father~

Happy Bday to my dear daddy..what can i say here..i feel really sry for not going back to celebrate v him and stay by his side for his remarkable moment..so sorry daddy~~

To talk about my dad..he is someone who himself never cares about'' when is his bday''..or even ''who will remember for him''..he never celebrates bday until the very first time when i insisted to had a bday party for him..yup..tis is my father..a man who is really cool and 'low-key'..i never know whether he really don't care..or he just trying to hide all these from us..but then i strongly believe he would be happy if we did something for him to show how mush we do love him~~

Daddy..u r d one i really admire at..u r d one i would always respect to..and u r d one whom i keep everything of him in my heart~~i do love u very much daddy..u take really good care of everything about me since i was born and maybe u not even notice this..i would never gonna forget how u care me and do everything to protect me..never punish me although i did break ur heart for so many times..not going to forget how nervous u r when i actually started a relationship v a guy whom u hv totally no idea with..thank you so much for everything dear daddy..^^

Once again..happy bday and may everything of you being blessed~~we love you daddy!!!

~a new beginning of semester~

I will be even brave..i promise~~

my 3 little brothers

v my mom

v bf at genting

cameron highland

Finally coming bc from hometown..goin to hv a new beginning of college life~~i'm goin to start my 2nd sem of adv diploma very very soon..was a little bit resistent..most probably is because i still DROWN in my previous life~~seriously i hv to admit that i miss penang's lifestyle a lot..and this actually cause myself hardly tolerate v kl's life..anyhow..it has been one semester over..i guess i should adapt v everything here even better..we should have learnt and grow from things happened around though..although memories in pg is still so fresh in my mind..keep playing just like a recorder at d same time keep reminds me about loads of thing~~

Went for 4-day-trip v family and my bf too..i am very grateful to spend more time v everyone in my family as i hardly find time to accompany them since i came here..although d places we visited were not really interesting for me..but still..it is enough for me when my dad smiled to us signified his happiness..i always know he wish to spend every single moment v us~~i love u..as for my mom..thx a lot for being so caring..i know u are tired running d business and most of the time u are the one handling those disturbance..so sry i always fail to help up..thx mom~~

Today is supposed to be our chinese 'moon cake festival'..and i sitting in front of my lap top..blogging and at d same moment..miss my family a lot~~may everyone of you be loved..For everyone of you out there..may all of u have a beautiful tomorrow and of course enjoy tonight~~thx for reading..nitez^^

~a note for 18/09/09~

Yippi!!!was a little bit getting too excited when those exam which tend to torture me for several sleepess night..finally i got myself to say goodbye to them..and pls..never come back!!!although not really did well i know..but is unwise if i were to worry a lot and SPOILT MY MOOD for celebration rite?...hehe..(i use to cover my mistake with a lot of excuses..sshhh)

I v all my classmates enjoyed the day at Sho Gun after end our exam for buffet dinner..I'm thankful that we could actually spend some time together before we are going to seperate ourselves to different group then..this is d sad part for us since we are getting closer v each other..i really appreciate the friendliness and sincere at d moment when i was so unappreciated v everything in kl~~a big thx to all of you..take care and may there are times for us to meet up again..

Also..we have a movie together-G-Force..a lovely movie which bring us a lot of laughters..i'm so happy that i actually grab a chance to watch this..to enable me to forget about those pressure and worries which the exam had brought to me these few days..i'm sure all of you may want to watch this..i bet u v this^^

And..not forget to say ''happy 1st-year anniversary'' sweetheart..although we don't get much time to have memorable celebration..but still i appreciate everything that u have actually given me..although we always quarrel for nothing..although i may be a lil barbaric..i hope for your understanding and be considerate towards my foolishness~~we hold promises to each other..d determinance of our heart towards love has walk us here..and i'm sure we have much more to proceed..no clue or shortcut to improve nor remain our love story but what we can do is only to love each other even more everyday..I love u^^

Have a goodnight sleep everyone...may our tomorrow will always a great day~~